July 26, 2000
Melissa seemed to enjoy her birthday, which will continue tonight at a special birthday dinner in her honor. But I'll let her tell you all about it.
Thanks, Susan! Brigadoon is one of my favorite old musicals too. And I know what you mean about Gene Kelly. Mmmm. Speaking of old movie stars, I still have a thing for Cary Grant.Bubba and Andy have been busy! I know I've written about this before, but I am very happy to have so many weblogs to read every day (or so) now. Whether it's true or not, I feel at least partly responsible for the way this has taken off in our little community. Nagging, begging and whining does work sometimes, I guess. Muahahahaha!
I enjoy reading not only about the day-to-day activities of my friends, but their questions and insights about life. So many of those questions are similar to those running through my own head, it's amazing. As Bubba asks, I too wonder why some people seem to love finding fault with others. To be fair, we probably all do that to some extent. It's difficult to see things from someone else's viewpoint and easy to overlook the good stuff and focus on the bad. But what he is talking about, I think, is a lot more than that.
In some cases, I think they do it because they simply believe they can do everything better than everyone else. It's an ego thing and a control thing. Maybe it's even a vision thing. They know in their heads how something should be and when the thing someone else has created deviates even slightly from that picture, the vision is unyielding. There's no room for interpretation by others.
With others, it may be because (as Bruce pointed out), their own sense of self-worth is so low that they have to do it in order to make themselves feel better. Whatever the thing is, criticism is how they say "I can see the problems in whatever you've done, so I must be better than you are." The difficulty there is twofold - first, they're the only one who really hears it, so we're not being convinced anyhow. And second, they haven't figured out that fear does not equal respect. So even if they get their way and get you on the defensive, they aren't getting what they wanted in the first place.
My last idea on this is that there are also people who are simply incredibly insensitive. They can't put themselves in your shoes and they don't care if they hurt your feelings or destroy your confidence. Somehow, they feel better when they tear something (or someone) down rather than building them up. This is probably the hardest to understand for most of us.
Honestly, sometimes I wish I could be more critical than I am. I am so impressed by the talents and skills of other people that I often am not as judgmental as I probably should be. Rather than wanting everything to be perfect, I tend to be more interested in keeping everyone happy. I believe people are usually doing the best they can, so I probably end up not demanding as much of them as I should. What ends up happening is that most of my anger and frustration is directed inward and I torment myself with it. I believe this to be one of my worst character flaws.
The good part is that I'm lucky enough to have people around me who understand and can listen to those frustrations I allow to spill out. Basically, my friends keep me sane. Thank God for them.
Enough of that nonsense. Now back to the important nonsense. Corey, all I said was I'd call you. Don't worry - I won't move in unless you ask. ;)
I watched a great episode of Northern Exposure last night that got me to thinking. (Scary.) The idea they presented was that, due to anomalies in the aurora borealis, the residents of Cicely started dreaming each others' dreams. Isn't that an interesting concept?
Think about it. What if your neighbor or your friend suddenly had one of your dreams? Most of them probably wouldn't make any sense, but there are others that I suspect the majority of us wouldn't want to share with anyone else. On the other hand, perhaps if Steph or Gryph had one of my dreams, they could explain why I keep dreaming about David Letterman. David Letterman?
What's with that, anyway? These aren't sexual fantasies or anything. Just your basic, everyday, nonsensical dreams, where he happens to play a role. If I'm going to dream about celebrities, I'd much rather be able to choose my celebrity. Harrison Ford comes to mind. Or Sean Connery, or Liam Neeson. But David Letterman?! I don't get it.
I'd probably be freaked out if I had Susan or Jeff's dreams. Theirs seem a trifle more bizarre than I'm used to. (Susan, I'll never forget the chainsaw dream, or the one about the hookers.) Or maybe they aren't more bizarre, it's just that I usually can't remember my dreams as clearly as they seem to.
So I leave you with that idea for the day. Let the thought of someone else having your dreams roll around in your head for awhile and then... hey! Write about it in your weblog, if you have one.
I'll be reading.
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